Gav
Join groom-to-be Gav as he charts his way through unknown territory...
Gavinidus, the ruler of bachelor parties
I had given up trying to work out when my bachelor party would be. (I’d figured it would be close to the wedding date, but was unsure of the exact day.)
I was spending the afternoon with Kirsty at her parents’ house, composing our wedding vows, when all of a sudden a group of my friends came through the door, video camera in hand, and dragged me off to what can only be described as one of the most memorable - and humiliating - experiences of my life (so far).
First up they took me around to my parents’ place, where they had a Spartan costume waiting (knowing that my all-time favourite movie is ‘300’). So for the rest of the afternoon, I was paraded around as a skirt-wearing Spartan.
Next up was ten-pin bowling, where I was forced to compete while wearing the very cumbersome helmet bestowed upon me back at my parents’ place. The thing is, though - everyone there had been instructed by the best men to bring with them two items that would potentially end up in a smoothie at the end of the evening. The rule was that every person who beat me at ten-pin bowling would be able to put one of his two items into the smoothie. I played as though my life depended on it… and came third last. Stupid helmet!
As if this total defeat wasn’t humiliating enough, I was then told to go and stand at the four-way intersection outside the Atrium and beg for money (I could stop only once I had R20). Fortunately this wasn’t too difficult, as the first group I targeted - the Boland Girls Water Polo Team, no less - gave me R10 to pose with them in photos. Clearly I still have what it takes…
Then it was down to Laser Quest, where the same consequences of getting beaten applied. It turns out, however, that I am actually quite good at Laser Quest, as I won and thereby succeeded in throwing a spanner in the works!
Finally we headed back to my parents’ place for a braai - and a smoothie. Before the night was over, and despite my win at Laser Quest, I was made to drink the smoothie containing all the items supplied by my friends and family. I also had to answer a few questions compiled by my best men. Failure to get the answers right, or to do what was requested, would result in having to eat either a baby tomato or a slice of avocado. This may not seem like much of a forfeit to you, but when you consider that my greatest fear is that one day scientists will splice the tomato and the avocado, resulting in a Frankenstein-food called the avomato (you’ve guessed it, I really dislike tomatoes and avocados!), you may begin to understand just how important it was that I got each and every answer right. Of course, the questions were rigged.
But despite all that I was made to do and eat, it was a truly amazing night spent with friends and family, and a great send-off from bachelorhood. I can hardly believe I’m saying this, but next up is THE WEDDING, on the 15th of December!
If you have any comments, feel free to email me: blogs@celebrationhouse.co.za
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